Dipankar's blog

SARDAR STRIKES AGAIN

dipankar — Mon, 22 Jun 2009 06:00:41 +0000

Prince Charles & Sardarji were having dinner.
Prince said, “Pass the wine you divine”.
Sardar thinks “how poetic”
Sardar says, “pass the custard you bastard”.

Sardar at bar in New York .
Man on his right says “Johny Walker single”
Man on his left says “Peter Scotch single”
Sardar says - “Baljith Singh Married”

Sardar: My mobile bill how much?
Call centre girl: sir, just dial 123to know current bill status
Sardar: Stupid, not CURRENT BILL my MOBILE BILL.

Q: How do you make a sardarji laugh on Saturday?
A: Tell him a joke on Wednesday.

Santa : “Ek litre gaaye{cow} Ka Dhoodh Dena.”
Banta : “Lekin Tumhara Bartan To Bahut Chhota Hai.”
Santa : “Theek He To Fir BAKRI Ka De de..”

Interviewer> To bataiye PANI ke bina Insan kaise Marega?
Sardar: PANI nai hoga to Insan Tairega kaise? Aur Tairega nahi to doob jayega!

Sardar: I think that girl is deaf..
Friend: How do u know?
Sardar: I told I Love her, but she said her chappals are new

Teacher: Which is the oldest animal in world?
Sardar: ZEBRA
Teacher: How?
Sardar: Bcoz it is Black & White

Judge: Don’t U have shame? It is d 3rd time U R coming to court.
Sardar to judge: U R coming daily, don’t U have shame?

Question: “Should Women have Children after 35?”
Smart Sardar Replied: “No!
35 Children R More than Enough!!”

Sardar attending an interview in Software Company.
Manager: Do U know MS Office?
Sardar: If U give me the address I will go there sir.

Sardar in airplane going 2 Bombay .. While its landing he shouted: ” Bombay … Bombay ”
Air hostess said: “B silent.”
Sardar: “Ok. Ombay. Ombay”

Sardar: Doctor! My Son swallowed a key
Doctor: When?
Sardar: 3 Months Ago
Dr: Wat were u doing till now?
Sardar: We were using duplicate key

Why Sardar opens his lunch box in the middle of the road???
Just 2 confirm whether he is going to or coming back from the office….

Son: papa, 4+3 kithne hai?
Sardar: ullu ke patthe gadhe idiot naalaayak besharam tujhe kuch nahi aathaa? Jaa andhar se CALCULATOR le ke Aa..

Teacher: “What is common between JESUS, KRISHNA , RAM, GANDHI and BUDHA?”
Sardar: “All are born on government holidays…!!!

When maths teacher writes love letter

dipankar — Fri, 12 Jun 2009 12:39:56 +0000

When maths teacher writes love letter

My Dear SweetHeart,

Yesterday, I was passing by your rectangular house in trigonometric lane.

There I saw you with our cute circular face,conical nose and spherical eyes,standing in your triangular garden.

Before seeing you my heart was a null set, but when a vector of magnitude (likeness) from your eyes at a deviation of theta radians made a tangent to my heart, it differentiated.

My love for you is a quadratic equation with real roots, which only you can solve by making good binary relation with me.

The cosine of my love for you extends to infinity.

I promise that I should not resolve you into partial functions but if I do so, you can integrate me by applying the limits from zero to infinity.

You are as essential to me as an element to a set.

The geometry of my life revolves around your acute personality.

My love, if you do not meet me at parabola restaurant on date 10 at sunset, when the sun is making an angle of 160 degrees, my heart would be like a solved polynomial of degree 10.

With love from your higher order derivatives of maxima and minima, of an unknown function.

C:\windows\system32\config\system missing or corrupt

dipankar — Mon, 11 May 2009 06:03:39 +0000

Problem:
You turn on your computer one day and find an error message in a black screen that says:

Windows could not start because the following file is missing or corrupt
C:\windows\system32\config\system

Solution:

You can repair this file by starting windows setup using the original setup CD-Rom. Select “r” at the first screen to start repair.
This process will only work if you have System Restore turned on. By default it is set to turned on. So if you were not changed it manually to set it off, this process will works properly.

What you are about to do is basically a minor System Restore via the Recovery Console. I say minor because you’re only going to copy part of the registry, not the whole thing. Since you are copying over a registry backup to be used you may loose some program(s) or their settings, it all depends on when the last Restore Point for System Restore was created. If some programs don’t work it’s really as simple as reinstalling them.
The text in Bold Red will be what you type and the black text will what the system outputs or what is put there by the system.
Here the steps:

C:\Windows>CD C:\system~1\_resto~1
C:\system~1\_resto~1\>dir

After you enter the DIR command and hit enter you will get a list of folders like such rp1, rp2, rp3, rp4, etc. etc. The “rp” part of the folder name denoting it’s a Restore Point.
What you’ll want to do is find the 2nd highest numbered folder in that list. So, for instance, if it listed rp1 through rp12 you’ll want the rp11 folder. I’ll use rp11 for the rest of this little fix just to keep things simple but substitute rp11 for whatever folder is the 2nd highest in the list on your pc.
Now follow the follwing commands:

C:\system~1\_resto~1>cd rp11

C:\system~1\_resto~1\rp11>cd snapshot

C:\system~1\_resto~1\rp11\snapshot>copy _registry_machine_system c:\windows\system32\config\system

Overwrite system [y,n]: y

1 file copied

C:\system~1\_resto~1\rp11\snapshot>exit

After typing “exit” and pressing “enter” on the keyboard please remove your Windows XP CD from the CD Drive and your computer will restart, hopefully into a working machine. If by some chance this did not fix your issue you can either go through this option again and try a different restore point or continue with the other options.

after login to your operating system, it is better to perform a check disk by chkdsk /r command from command promt.

Start->Run->cmd
C:\Documents and Settings\Administrator>cd\
C:\>chkdsk /r

Marital Woes

dipankar — Thu, 23 Apr 2009 06:03:58 +0000

Getting married is very much like going to a restaurant with friends. You order what you want, then when you see what the other person has, you wish you had ordered that.

*************************************

Man: Is there any way for long life?
Dr: Get married.

Man: Will it help?
Dr: No, but the thought of long life will never come.

*************************************

Why do couples hold hands during their wedding?

It’s a formality just like two boxers shaking hands before the fight begins!

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Wife: Darling today is our anniversary, what should we do?

Husband: Let us stand in silence for 2 minutes.

*************************************

It’s funny when people discuss Love Marriage vs Arranged.

It’s like asking someone, if suicide is better or being murdered

*************************************

It is difficult to understand GOD. He makes such beautiful things as women and then he turns them into Wives

*************************************

If u r married please ignore this msg,

for everyone else: Happy Independence Day

*************************************

Before marriage, a man will lie awake all night thinking about something you say.

After marriage, he’ll fall asleep before you finish.

*************************************

There’s a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. It’s called marriage

*************************************

Galfriends r like chocolates,
taste gud anytime.

Lovers r like PIZZAS, Hot n spicy, eaten frequently.
Wife r like Dal RICE, eaten when there`s no choice

*************************************

Man receives telegram: Wife deadshould be buried or cremated?

Man: Don’t take any chances. Burn the body and bury the ash.

*************************************

Prospective husband: Do you have a book called ‘Man, The Master of Women’?

Salesgirl: The fiction department is on the other side, sir.

*************************************

Q: Why dogs don’t marry?

A: Because they are already leading a dog’s life!

*************************************

There was this guy who told his woman that he loved her so much that he would go through hell for her. They got married and now he is going thru hell.

*************************************

Fact of life: One woman brings you into this world crying & the other ensures you continue to do so for the rest of your life!

*************************************

Q: Why doesn’t law permit a man to marry a second woman?

A: Because as per law you cannot be punished twice for the same offense!

*************************************

Earth Hour India :today 8:30PM-9:30PM (IST)

dipankar — Sat, 28 Mar 2009 08:25:10 +0000

Earth Hour is an international event organised by the WWF, and held on the last Saturday of March each year, which asks households and businesses to turn off their non-essential lights and electrical appliances for one hour to raise awareness towards the need to take action on climate change. Earth hour was conceived by WWF Australia and the Sydney Morning Herald in 2007, when 2.2 million residents of Sydney participated by turning off all non-essential lights.
Following Sydney’s lead, many other cities around the world adopted the event in 2008
Earth Hour 2009 is from 8:30 p.m. to 9:30 p.m. local time, 28-03-2009. Currently, 82 countries and more than 2100 cities are ‘committed to Earth Hour 2009′, a huge increase from people participating in 35 countries for Earth Hour 2008. 1 billion ‘votes’ is the stated aim for Earth Hour 2009, in the context of the pivotal 2009 United Nations Climate Change Conference.
Among the participants this year is, for the first time, the United Nations building. The U.N. conservatively estimates that its participation will save $102 in energy.

Earth Hour in India

earth-hour India

Our country India is also joined in Earth Hour 2009 in the global fight against climate change. As one of the most pressing challenges facing mankind today, climate change is in no way less alarming than the evident threat of terrorism that the nation is currently reeling under. Lights will be dimmed on buildings and pivotal landmarks and monuments throughout the city centers on 28th March 09 and thousands of people in several cities of India will be coming together to celebrate, in candlelight, the Earth Hour campaign.
The only way to truly reduce greenhouse gas emissions, to take the pressure off climate change, is through an international treaty on climate pollution. And the only way that will happen is if politicians around the world become convinced that climate change is an issue that concerns people, one that will make them change the way they live, spend — and vote. Hundreds of Indian residents will switch off their lights for Earth Hour as symbol of this positive message of change to the world.

Sachin Tendulkar, Amir Khan, Infosys, Intel, Wipro, Nokia are going to turn off their lights on earth hour. Are you?.

come and Join for Earth Hour 2009, turn off your lights at 8.30pm Saturday 28 March and sign-up here at Earth hour India..

Google
Earth Hour has also received free publicity from the Google corporation. From 12:00 a.m. on March 29, 2008 until the end of Earth Hour, the Google homepage in the United States, Colombia, Canada, Denmark, Ireland and the UK was turned to a black background. Their tagline is, “We’ve turned the lights out. Now it’s your turn - Earth Hour.”

google earth hour

However, Google stated that for 2009 they would not turn the page black again due to the confusion it caused many users. A common misconception is that having a black background on a web page reduces the power consumption of monitors; LCD monitors use a constant amount of power regardless of which colors are shown. This is not the case for Organic LED monitors, though they are not currently in popular use.

So, Come and Join the Earth Hour 2009, turn off your lights at 8.30pm Saturday 28 March and sign-up here at Earth hour India....

Information taken from http://en.wikipedia.org and http://www.earthhour.in/

Parked Domain, Add-on Domain and Sub domain

dipankar — Sat, 21 Mar 2009 18:37:16 +0000

Most of us, who is very new to web hosting, confused about these three terms sub domains, add-on domain and parked domains. But these things are important for web hosting. Now I am trying to explain what actually they are.

Addon Domain: An add-on domain is just like having a separate web site. The add-on domain will be hosted or pointed to a folder in your public_html folder of your main-domain. The Add-on domain should be already registered and the nameservers for the add-on domain should be pointing the same nameserves as your main-domain. Accessing the addondomain will display that very domain name in the address bar of their browser, so its similar to a separate web site. An add-on domain uses the space and bandwidth available to the main domain. An add-on domain will have its own CGI and FTP access, its own email accounts and web stats.
To add an add-on domain to your account:
1) login to your cPanel
2) go to the “Domains” menu and click “Addon Domains”
3) next put the details of your new domain and click add Domain button.
And you have successfully added your addon domain for your website.

Parked Domain: A parked domain is one which simply points to an existing domain. It is an other domain which is parked on to the main domain. Consider a domain “parked.com” which is parked on the “yourdomain.com”. If we access parked.com it will be directed to the yourdomain.com and you will get the same page as you see while accessing yourdomain.com. The parked domain should also point to the same nameservers as the main-domain.com. The park domain name should be registered. To add a parked domain to your account:
1) login to your cPanel
2) go to the “Domains” menu and click “Parked Domains”
3) Add your new domain.
Domains must be registered with a valid registrar before they can be parked. In addition, they will not be functional unless they are configured to point to your DNS servers.

Sub Domain: A sub domain utilises the existing main domain name. It does not have its own domain name. A sub domain points to a folder in your public_html directory of your main-domain. Consider you main domain ” yourname.com” and you have a folder “shop” under your public_html directory. You can create a sub domain “shop.yourname.com”. You can directly reach the shop page by accessing “shop.yourname.com”. You might have seen “mail.yahoo.com”, ” mail.google.com”. These are sub domains for yahoo.com and google.com.
To add a sub domain to your account:
1) login to your cPanel
2) go to the “Domains” menu and click “Subdomains”

3) give your subdomain name. e.g. shop
4) give the document root. i.e. the name of the folder under your public_html directory.

5) click “Create” button to create the subdomain.

Google Browser, Google Chrome

dipankar — Wed, 03 Sep 2008 08:03:16 +0000

Today i found a new message at my home page, google.com, that Google release a open source browser, Google Chrome. It is in BETA version. I downloaded and install to my PC. And it works superb, with a simple design and a nice blue theme. Google Chrome is clean and fast.
If you are familiar with firefox, you find that Instead of traditional tabs like those seen in Firefox, Chrome puts the tab buttons on the upper side of the window, not below the address bar.

It keeps each tab in an isolated “sandbox”, to prevent one tab from crashing another and provide improved protection from rogue sites. It has a built in JavaScript engine, V8, which is more powerful, to power the next generation of web applications that aren’t even possible in today’s browsers.

Download Google Chrome..

The browser has an address bar with auto-completion features. Called ’omnibox’, Google says it offers search suggestions, top pages you’ve visited, pages you didn’t visit but which are popular amd more. The omnibox (“omni” is a prefix meaning “all”, as in “omniscient” – “all-knowing”) also lets you enter e.g. “digital camera” if the title of the page you visited was “Canon Digital Camera”. Additionally, the omnibox lets you search a website of which it captured the search box; you need to type the site’s name into the address bar, like “amazon”, and then hit the tab key and enter your search keywords.

As a default homepage Chrome presents you with a kind of “speed dial” feature, similar to the one of Opera. On that page you will see your most visited webpages as 9 screenshot thumbnails. To the side, you will also see a couple of your recent searches and your recently bookmarked pages, as well as recently closed tabs.

Web apps can be launched in their own browser window without address bar and toolbar. Mozilla has a project called Prism that aims to do similar (though doing so may train users into accepting non-URL windows as safe or into ignoring the URL, which could increase the effectiveness of phishing attacks).

But the Google Chrome is only for browsing, if you are viewing the source the page and willing to save the source code, you will not find the option to save. Since, this is BETA version, may be Google will solve this issues in their next version.

Cheers Google..

Vodafone’s first iPhone 3G in Kolkata

dipankar — Fri, 22 Aug 2008 07:41:36 +0000

Finally the iphone reach the city of joy on yesterday with fast 3G wireless technology, GPS mapping, support for enterprise features like Microsoft Exchange, and the new App Store, iPhone 3G puts even more features at your fingertips. And like the original iPhone, it combines three products in one — a revolutionary phone, a widescreen iPod, and a breakthrough Internet device with rich HTML email and a desktop-class web browser.
India’s soccer captain Baichung Bhitia is the first customer and user of iphone 3G as Vodafone launches its iPhone at the stroke of midnight yesterday. Bhutia was picked up by mobile phone giant for his successful leadership to lead India in the AFC soccer championship held in Hyderabad and New Delhi recently. Mr Sridhar Rao, CEO, Vodafone Essar East ltd, will hand over the first iPhone 3G to Bhutia at its store in central Kolkata.
Apple’s combination of cell phone, media player, and wireless Web surfing device will cost around Rs 31,000 for 8GB version and Rs 36,100 for 16 GB.
The iPhone does not have a keypad, instead sports a touch-sensitive screen. The iPhone features a 3.5-inch display, 2-megapixel camera, headset and audio jacks, and an iPod dock. This looks so very cool and exciting.

The Pioneer of Bengali Movie

dipankar — Fri, 22 Aug 2008 06:34:26 +0000

We know the road Madan Street or Madan Square, but we don’t know who the man was. The roads belongs to the name of a Great man who came east from the west to rising up the sun of the bengali film industry, Jamshedji Framji Madan.

Jamshedji Framji Madan (1856–1923), born in a Parsi family in Bombay, was one of the pioneers of the Indian film industry and he was the man who makes first silent Movie in Bengali language. In kolkata No can can think that it can be an industry before him.
In 1902, he started bioscope shows in a tent in Maidan, Calcutta along with similar shows in Corinthian Theatre. The equipments used were procured from Pathé Frères of Paris. Most of the films shown in those shows were from Pathé Productions. These bioscope shows (A Bioscope show was a fairground attraction consisting of a traveling cinema) were organized under the banner of Elphinstone Bioscope Company. Elphinstone Bioscope Company produced a number of short films. He also started film shows in Alfred Theater, which he bought in the same year.

In 1907, he established Elphinstone Picture Palace (currently known as Chaplin Cinema), which was the first permanent show house in Calcutta.

He also opened Madan Theatre and Palace of Varieties (now known as Elite Cinema).

After World War I, his business started growing rapidly. In 1919, his film production business became a joint stock company with the name of Madan Theatres Limited. Madan Theatres and its associates had great control over theatre houses in India during that period. In 1919, Madan produced the first Bengali feature film, Billwamangal. It was first screened in the Cornwallis Theatre (now known as the Sree Cinema).

The Madan Theatre Company has its roots in 1902 when Jamshedji Framji Madan, a wine merchant who came to Calcutta from Bombay as a child, started his entertainment business by acquiring two theatre companies in Calcutta and then beginning film exhibitions.

The Electric Theatre (now known as Regal Cinema), Grand Opera House (currently known as Globe Cinema) and Crown Cinema (now known as Uttara Cinema) were all owned by Madan Theatres.

His films were marked by a high degree of technical sophistication, facilitated by his employment of experienced foreign directors like Eugenio De Liguoro, Camille Le Grand and Georgio Mannini. Such expertise was complemented by grand sets and popular mythological storylines which ensured good returns. Many of these films were versions of earlier popular theatrical forms. Liguoro directed Nala Damayanti (1920) and Dhruva Charitra (1921), Le Grand directed Ratnavali (1922), and Mannini directed Savitri Satyavan (1923). Patience Cooper, one of the early stars of Indian Cinema, acted in many of the movies produced by Madan Theatres.

Madan also took the initiative in obtaining the film rights for works of stalwarts of Bengali literature like Bankim Chandra Chatterjee and Rabindranath Tagore. Madan Theatres produced films like Bishabriksha, Durgesh Nandini (1927) and Radharani (1930), based on Bankim Chandra’s works. Giribala (1929) was based on Tagore’s work.

NOD32 and Comodo Antivirus Review

dipankar — Sun, 10 Aug 2008 15:23:41 +0000

Whenever we are entering the web, we all have a fear of virus, spywares and hacking. To get out from this nightmare we use different antivirus and firewall for our security purposes.
I have used many antivirus software and test their performance, power, resource usability, update frequency.
At the very beginning I’m just remove the name of Norton, as my own opinion Norton sucks; it uses a high resource and after installation the performance of my system decreased.
From the last two years I’m using Eset NOD32 version 2.7 and I’m satisfied with its performance. It is very powerful and rich with features. The update option is there and it can be scheduled as you can also schedule the system scan. There is 4 different modules for threat protection along with the antivirus, AMON- for file system monitor, check files at their runtime; DMON- MS Office document monitor, check the MS documents such as word, excel etc.; IMON- Internet Monitor, monitor every page you open and warn you if found any threat or spywares. It uses low resource compare to other antivirus softwares. But it is not free.
In between I install another antivirus software named Comodo Antivirus. It is totally free. Comodo is mainly popular for their Firewall which is really a good product and free. The antivirus software is in BETA mode, still It works fine to detect and remove the viruses. It is also reach in features. It has a option of HIPS, first time you open any program, it wile ask for permission if it is not in the safe list database of Comodo, i.e, if you are opening a word document, it will ask to allow executing the winword.exe file. There is a option to submit the file to Comodo lab directly and they will test and mail you the result. There is also a choice to disable this option as it may be irritating to you to allowing all the programs. This option I didn’t found in any other antivirus software. And the main feature is Its resource consumtion, you dont believe it uses minimum resource, which is lower than NOD32.

Now choice is yours; If you are looking for a free antivirus and you are using a system of low processor and RAM, then go for Comodo, otherwise NOD32 is the best.